haven't been updating recently.
had scrabble competition yesterday.
played three games and won all of them!
hope my team do get into the finals./=


where things are sugar sweet,
where things are how they are meant to be.


to those sec 3s who are asking
if i will choose nicholas or alvin,
let me answer your question.

first, there's nothing going on between nicholas and i.
we're just friends.
maybe a little better.
but nothing more than that.
things aren't what you all think them to be.
i know who he likes, and he knows who i love.
there's seriously nothing going on.

second, i'm attached.
so yeah.
guess that spells everything.(:


here's a post for speech day and carnival.
a little late i know.
hahs.


so yeah.
that's almost all of the photos i've taken on speech cum carnival day.
very little photos taken huh?
sad.
had loads of fun that day.
after which, damn shag.
very very tired.




love is more than just an emotion.
love is an affection for another person.
love is having mutual trust in each other.
love is being selfless.
love is about give and take.
love is about care and concern.

i don't know why i'm typing all these.
sigh.








finally got to know what's the title of this song.
yeah i know.
song of a thousand years ago.
ha.
but it's still a nice song.
looking through the lyrics just make me like this song more.
meaningful.
alright. off to bed.
dead beat.


CONGRATULATIONS TO CHINESE DANCERS.
FOR GETTING GOLD FOR SYF.

having mixed feelings now.
sigh.
i seriously got to stop feeling emo.
i hate this.
although not much people have actually really seen that side of me,
but yeah.
i am hardcore emo recently.
i had enough of it.
and guess my dear alvin had enough of it too.

i wish for us to be back to how we were in the past.
exactly how we were.
cos those were the time.
time where things were honey sweet...








the rain had arrived.(:
i shall get into my slippers
and get into the rain.
catch every single drop of rain,
jump into every single puddle.
for this is the rain,
i had waited for days.(:

so busy now.
have to complete one chinese compo
and one unit of AMaths TYS.
and i'm currently stuck with my compo.
BAHHH.
gogo tys.

don't ever stop the rain !



i'm like waiting for the rain in a drought.
i'm feeling real down now.
with a lot of stuff going through my brain.
yet i've nobody to talk to.
i'm wondering why i'm in such a state.
why are we not talking.
i promised myself not to cry.
i hate breaking promises.
but yet at times i can't help it.
scars will be left there forever.
how true.

i can't wait to hear your voice.





wondering what you're doing now.
wondering what you did last night.
did you sleep well?
i hope you did.
wanted to call you a lot of times.
but i know you need your peace.
i promised to give you your freedom,
your piece of silence when you need it.
i can't break my promise.
i need to keep it.
so here i am wondering.
wondering what's happening in your world.
i hope you're feeling better.
i hope you're calmed down a little.
i hope you recover soon.
no one else can help you in this battle.
you've to do it alone.
but fret not, i'll be here beside you.

i wonder when this silence will be broken.






i feel like kissing you and make the whole world seems right for you.
yet i can't and i feel real bad.
i'm somehow adding on to your burden.
i'm sad. i'm guilty.
i'm going to change cos i'm not as good as you think.
i aren't as perfect as you voiced.
i admit i was over-sensitive, emotional and stuff,
and it's seriously irritating at times.
that's why i'm changing.
i want to stand by you through all this.
i want you to recover soon.
i want the old times back,
where things were much better
and much happier.

just want to let you know,
i'll be here by you.
no matter how long you're going to take to regain all that you've lost.
i just hope that things get back to how they were.

guess these three words were said many times,
over and over again.
but yet, nothing else bring out what i want to say as well as them.
iloveyou.




so much things are happening right in front of my very eyes.
i know whatever i'm troubled over sounds stupid,
but i guess THEY somehow are important to me
that's why i care so much.

guess tomorrow i shall try to end everything.
end all my misery.
it's either tomorrow or never.
i don't wanna waste my time being afraid anymore.
i don't wanna waste my time being troubled over this anymore.
i don't wanna waste my tears on being troubled.
i just wanna have my peaceful life back.
can't i?


ha. i don't mind having the plague.(:
cute little thing.


i'm bored./=
didn't come online last night thus didn't blog.
hai. feeling a little emo.
thinking of my illness and some little other stuff.
since the beginning of this year i kept falling sick lah.
so irritating.
i think my parents spent more than a hundred bucks on my medical bills already.
hope i get stronger soon.

had maths test today.
quite alright but there goes my full marks.
oh wells.




today is such a boring day for me.
other than going for tuition,
i stayed at home for the whole day.
but however, i've learnt a meaningful lesson.
so i guess, i'm prepared for school tomorrow.
so you guys aren't going to beat me down.(:






haven't been updating recently.
so much things happened.
good, bad, a lot.
guess i'm mentally unstable now.




went to ikea after school.
bought sausage bun for him.
cut my right index finger.
at first i thought it was just some scratches.
then after i look carefully, i found out it was very deep.
then i got a shocked.
it was very pain lah...
then after like 15minutes? then it started bleeding.
lol a retarded cut.

haha yeah.
anyway, chinese test was difficult.
or rather, my chinese is poor.):
guess i have to buck up.
GO GO YENSZE! :D


i love you, i really do.
i really didn't meant to hurt you.
and i didn't think of doing so.
forgive me my dear.
for all the harm i've done.
but i guess all was just a misunderstanding.
i hope you get well soon.
hope it'll be sunshine after rain soon,
and that giraffe and sheep can come out to play soon.
i love you.


the feeling of helplessness sucks.
i can't do anything but to cry.
i called all my friends but yet none of them were free.
can anyone understand my current feeling?
all i can do is hide myself and cry.
cry cry cry.
cry like there's no tomorrow.
but what can all these tears do?
you don't even care about my feelings.
and you don't even want to tell me yours.
love is a two people thing. not one.
i don't think you'll ever get this point.
i don't know if whatever you say is out of anger.
but i seriously hope you start reflecting.
stop doing things out of harsh.
cos you're not the one getting hurt, i am.
i am the one getting hurt.
and i am the one tearing cos of all this shit.
can you please stop hurting me.
that includes whatever you thought of.
you know what i'm talking about.
i'm sure you do.
if you need time to cool down,
can you just tell me instead.
you're really being very selfish now.
all you think about is yourself.
and even if you did think of my feelings,
you aren't me.
you won't know what's best for me.
and i'm sure with that, you can't conclude that's best for us.


school today was pretty alright.
feeling kind of emo now.
thought of a lot a lot of things.
sad ones, happy ones.
but i guess the sad ones had more influence over me.
cos i'm feeling real upset now.

thinking from when we just started,
so many things happened.
there're both the touching ones, as well as the heartbreaking ones.
guess i still can't get out of the shadow of the cool down period.
i'm real upset.
after you declared the period over,
i guess my feelings were somehow forgotten.
you stopped asking me what happened when i'm sad,
all you did was to ask me not to think.
i feel like telling you how i feel.
but yet i'm afraid you'll get pissed and angry.
but now i can't take it any longer.
i can't contain my tears any longer as i'm typing this post.
maybe i'm being paranoid.
maybe i'm thinking too much.
maybe things aren't as bad as i think them to be.
but it's all these maybes that cause me to get hurt.
cos most of the time,
all those maybes aren't what the truth is.
when can we talk things out happily?
without anyone getting hurt?
most of the time when i tried telling you all my problems,
all you do is talk back and leave me speechless.
do you know how sad i am?
perhaps you think you're good when you talk back.
i don't know.
what i know is i'm very hurt.